Okay that isn't completely accurate, but when it comes to my internal self, stable doesn't enter the discription box. "Well duh, Jen, you have bipolar. You're suppose to be unstable." Yeah I know. I guess eighteen years of living with that fact isn't enough time to get use to it. Don't get me wrong...instability isn't ALL bad. I love spontinuity and my adaptabilty to new situations. It's nice in a way to not be predictable. Sometimes things that make everyone else sad or miffed don't phase me. On the flip side, sometimes ridiculous things, that doesn't bother anyone else, upset me greatly. This concept has been rather odd to me, as I don't hear a lot of bipolar-discussion specifially targeting it. I have my normal range of emotions (or at least ones I think are normal) that roll me through day to day life. When I'm abonormally low or high, I feel like my emotional-reactions are broken. Something exciting will happen, but I don't care. Something tragic will happen, but I won't feel sympathetic. Something that usually just cheers me up will send me to cloud nine.
Well those are my thoughts for now. Life is good. The mist is clearing and I have a lot in my future to be excited for. Yes, I still worry about falling off the bike, but I'm looking at the sky and road ahead instead of the pavement.
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